Touched By An Angel

"The LORD is close to the broken-hearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit."
--Psalm 34:18

I came across Noemi's blog and had the urge to read it. Awarded as the Best Website by The Philippine Web Awards this year, I realized that she really deserved the award.

I was moved by her blog about her little angel, Luijoe. Her six-year-old son who died of drowning in 2001. I couldn't help but burst into tears while reading her story because somehow I could feel the pain of losing her most precious. It's the saddest and the most painful thing that could ever happen to a parent. It could destroy your life in an instant.

...I'd rather die if that happened to me. I won't survive. I just know I won't. The pain, the grief, the loss, the regret, the guilt, the sadness -- I can't handle them. So God, please don't let it happen to me! Take my life first. (Done deal?)

I remember what Manay Gina de Venecia once said when she guested on MOMS (a talkshow for mommies on QTV Channel 11) a few months after her youngest daughter KC died in a fire accident. She said, "The pain [of losing a child] will never go away. You just have to learn to live with the pain each day..."

That episode of MOMS made me cry really hard. The topic was "Pagdadalamhati ng isang Ina". And guess what? Noemi was one of the guests pala! I just didn't remember her. So when I saw this article on her blog, I was shocked. What a coincidence! S'ya pala yung naponood ko sa MOMS sa episode na 'yun! The other guests were Alicia Alonzo, Manay Gina de Venecia and there's another one aside from Noemi, I just forgot got the name. Anyway, that episode was a real tear-jerker. Each of them narrated how they struggled to overcome the loss of their child. It's an inspiring episode that I couldn't forget. You don't need to be in their shoes to feel their pain.

Anyway, during the Holy Week of 2000, I experienced losing someone in our family for the very first time. It actually took me months to recover from our first loss. Just like Luijoe, my eleven-year-old cousin died of drowning at a resort in Quezon City (Gubat Sa Ciudad). I cried everyday everytime I remember her (wherever I was. Kahit nasa jeep!). It also made me realize that if this tragedy was enough to tear me apart, how much worse it could've been for her mother? She must've been at her worst, grieving silently for her daughter that she would never see, hug and kiss again. But seeing my aunt now, I can say that she had recovered. But I know that somehow, deep in her heart, that the pain will always be there. She just learned how to deal with it.

P.S:
Thank you for sharing your experience with us, Ms. Noemi. I salute moms like you. Please know that you have my deepest sympathy and that my heart cries out with you. I have read almost everything from your website to Luijoe's up to the memorial website that you created for your beloved father. I must say that you are so brave to have overcome those tragic deaths in your family.

By the way, I'll go to National Bookstore to get a copy of your book "Fallen Cradle". Promise. :-)